Tag: cry

What the hell is wrong with me? Nothing really.

It seems that I cry more these days as I have gotten older. My stoic husband can get weepy when watching a sappy movie, sometimes (he will deny this). But some people tend to cry more naturally than others and I fit into that category.

So why does it seem people are ashamed to cry? Because it’s been drummed into us (especially men) that crying is a sign of weakness or even seen as unprofessional.

Our two dogs—what my wife and me considered our first "children"—graduated to the dog park in the sky.

Ivy, a 16-year-old blue Merle Australian shepherd, and Hunter, a 14-year-old black chow shepherd mix, lived long, relatively healthy lives. However, in the end, we felt we had to assist them along their journey allowing them to leave with dignity and not suffer unduly.

Both Ivy and Hunter were adopted after an early life of abuse. Ivy sprung back very well after she adjusted to her new family.

Ahhhhh… the absolute bliss of being a newlywed! Every day is sheer perfection. Life couldn’t be rosier!

I know that the honeymoon will never be over in my marriage! I’m laughing out loud, because—as most newlyweds like myself will attest—the early days of marriage are not always smooth.

As you read, maybe you’ll find yourself commiserating with me, and maybe you’ll just shake your head and laugh. In sharing my laughable journey with you, I hope to help other couples feel not so alone—or at least not altogether "abnormal." In fact, there’s a comforting, humbling humanness in sharing my personal experiences from the inside out.

I had a small breakdown the other night. It involved tears, closed bathroom doors and small voices so that Luisa, David’s mom, wouldn’t hear. Maybe it was from the physical exhaustion of moving the 22 boxes that had just arrived from New York, maybe it was the permanency that the arrival of the boxes symbolized, maybe it was frustration from yet another day fighting to understand the simplest of sentences, maybe it was feelings of self doubt about whether I was doing my best to be the best daughter-in-law possible, maybe it was feeling far from home and the fact that being with David’s family makes me miss my own. And most likely it was the combination of all those things that made me surrender to a small moment of complete self pity.

It came like a wave and I couldn’t keep my head above the crashing water. I’ve only just recently understood what a big decision it was to move to Spain.