Tag: Diane Gottsman

Being married means having someone you can trust and confide in—even if it’s someone else's darkest secret, right? Just because you're married doesn't mean you can throw away the filter between your brain and your mouth if it can do someone else a great deal of harm. Even in the most open, honest relationships there are some things you should consider keeping to yourself. Here are eight prime examples:

1. "Susie made me promise not to tell but…" The risk here is that your husband may forget the "don't tell anybody" part and mention it next time he sees Susie. Some people automatically exempt spouses from the "don't tell anybody" rule, figuring that it's bound to come up during pillow talk.

The holidays are a time of rituals and traditions. As a newly married couple, it’s a time to examine your own expectations and attitudes about the holidays and begin to establish your own ways to celebrate.

Since each of you comes to the relationship with your own ideas about what the holidays mean and the "right" way to mark them, it’s an opportunity to merge traditions and create new ones of your own. Here are six steps to a merrier holiday season:

With summer approaching, you’ve decided to whisk your spouse away for a romantic trip to the big city. You’re in for a great adventure, with an array of sights, shopping, theaters, restaurants, museums and much more. But, once you arrive at your travel destination, are you prepared to navigate your way through a major metropolis? It pays to do a little homework to make sure you and your sweetie get to those amazing sights and attractions smoothly and efficiently.

In my last article, I discussed how to graciously deliver an apology. This article will go over some tips on how to graciously accept an apology. As a reminder, an apology should contain some key components such as sincerity, remorse and the acceptance of responsibility, as well as an action plan for the future. Although there is no guarantee that the person apologizing may not offend you again, there is value and healing in forgiveness; and accepting an apology is a critical step in moving forward in your relationship.

1. It won’t happen overnight. Just because you receive an apology doesn’t mean you are automatically ready to forgive and forget.

1. Snail mail or e-mail your itenerary to the host in advance. Include your flight schedule, arrival and departure times and city that you will be transferring planes. Whether you are traveling by bus, train or air, don’t assume that the host will be able to pick you up, unless they offer. Be prepared to take a taxi to get to your hosts’ home.

2. Arrive with a hostess gift in your suitcase or pick something up on the way to their home. Do some sleuthing in advance of your visit. Ask the host questions and find out their interest or hobbies. If they collect teacups, a nice basket of tea, decorative napkins and a beautiful teacup would be thoughtful.