Tag: end of life

Have you defined what it means to you to "die well?" If you’re like most of us, the answer is probably "no." For my husband Bruce, who was diagnosed with terminal cancer, dying well meant he died at home surrounded by his loving family, free of fear and pain.

While most Americans prefer to die at home and have control over their healthcare decisions, this is not the case for many of us. Although 90% of those on Medicare say they want end-of-life care at home, only one-third achieve it.

You don’t often see joy used in the same sentence as death. But when my husband Bruce was diagnosed with an aggressive stage 4 cancer, my family had to confront his impending death and in the process we found ways to surround him with friends, children, grandchildren, laughter, memories, love, and yes, joy.

When Bruce decided to stop treatment, he transitioned from being someone who was sick and fighting for time to someone who was dying and fighting for the things that made him happy: family, traveling, chocolate, wine. By accepting he was dying we were all able to focus our energies on achieving the peaceful end-of-life experience that he wanted.