Tag: intention

When you are part of a couple, it is best to know that conflict is inevitable and baked into the cake of relationship. The issue is not whether you have conflict, but rather how you deal with it when it arises.

Let’s first review some unhealthy ways of fighting that lead to a further divide: physical explosions and/or physical contact during anger, shutting down, avoiding, criticizing, blaming, yelling, using abusive name-calling or words, using past experiences as evidence to make a point, referring to other people’s opinions to support your argument, public demonstrations of anger, being dismissive and belittling, starting your statements with "You always..." or "You never..."

Change is inevitable: relationships and roles end, jobs disappear, business deals fall apart, finances become strained, family and friends move away, illnesses or disabilities erode health, loved ones die, and life as you knew it can transform overnight. Mine did as I navigated through chaotic times for many years when my husband was stricken with a mysterious, disabling illness.

Keeping your energy up and stress level down through these shifts is vital for your well-being, health, and peace of mind. Let these strategies guide you through times of change.

How should you approach the topic of changing your spouse’s behavior? Well, ultimatums do not work! If you are too vague your husband or wife might not understand your intention. Nagging never works! Talking negatively about your spouse's behavior in a joking fashion in front of others is definitely a no no! So what to do?

Be a friend. See it from your spouse’s perspective. Have they been doing it for years? Are they as unhappy about the behavior as you are and know they need to change?

For those of you celebrating holidays or attending events, there are ways you can support yourself, and it is important to plan ahead a bit with your energy points. If you have 100 points of energy for the day, it is likely that the group gathering, whether for work or with family, can drain a lot of points for a highly sensitive person (HSP). If you go into that event without your full points, you may have a hard time, but there are ways to preserve your energy points with some conscious intention.