Tag: kindness

Marriage isn’t a cake that you put in the oven and check on in 15 years. You need to be an active participant in cultivating, nurturing, and energizing your relationship with your partner. This is particularly important given that American Psychological Association has found that 40-50% of first marriages end in divorce and 60-70% of second marriages end in divorce. Having a strong, satisfying marriage over time will have an unparalleled impact on your day-to-day happiness and long-term feelings of well-being.

Miracles start to happen when you give as much energy to your dreams as you do to your fears." ~ Richard Wilkins

A dear friend was lamenting the state of the world these days, and indeed, the wars, shootings, political and legal wrangles are disturbing to those who want peace and prosperity for all. In addition to the natural disasters, which seem constant: fires, floods, hurricanes and tornadoes.

When Lady Gaga recently told her fans that kindness—not wealth and fame—is what creates harmony in the world she may have been on to something. Research has shown that being kind makes us happier and also is contagious, inspiring others to be kind as well. For example, one such study published in the Journal of Social Psychology linked performing acts of kindness to an increase in life satisfaction.

That’s why as people make their resolutions for the coming New Year, they should make up their minds to commit purposeful acts of kindness every day.

"One day in retrospect the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful." ~Sigmund Freud

I recently shared the revelations about how what I have been forcing myself to forget has caught up to me. I decided I had to start remembering differently; so now, one week in to this new agreement with myself in my marriage, a few things have come clear. The thing is that the remedy is not really a revelation at all. In fact, it is so basic as to almost be an embarrassment to share just how much I had forgotten these basic truths that make a relationship a warm and comfortable place to reside. So although you may likely have heard this before, I realized just how often we need a reminder of how kindness transforms us and makes love possible.

You can address negative thoughts in a number of ways. Develop a consistent mental workout regime to improve your thinking by sleeping better, reducing irritability, and avoiding getting fatigued. A healthy diet will lead to a healthier mental state and improved quality of life. Diet changes and a consistent workout regime help you stay calmer when you’re communicating with your partner about a problem; it will also help you stay focused.

Being calm and mindful of your partner is easier said than done. It takes a conscious daily effort to incorporate healthy thinking that leads to positive change.

As we struggle to emerge from these long months of pandemic, it can be challenging to find the strength to keep going. It’s not just the constantly shifting COVID protocols, there’s our work situations; our finances; and our living conditions, which for many of us keep changing and morphing—sometimes into non-existence. And there are the continual stresses of our family life, as kids do (or don’t) make it to school; whether online or in person; and it’s hard to have any kind of stable routine, whether you have five children, none, or are single.

If you asked 100 men what they look for in a woman, you may get 100 different answers. Some men like blondes. Some like brunettes. Some like tall, willowy women. Others like short ladies. Yet if you ask a man that’s married what he finds important in his wife, an important trend emerges.

Being in a marriage with a woman who's beautiful doesn't mean much to a man if his wife is rude, selfish or demanding. Often, women forget that men are attracted to who they are and not just what they look like. Good looks may have caught his attention, but who you are on the inside is what will make or break the relationship in the end.