Tag: limits

If someone close to you asked you to describe your ideal sexual experience, what kind of encounter would you describe? How would it begin? What would be involved? Where would it take place? Most importantly, how would it feel?

For some, the answers to these questions may be easy to articulate. For others, not so much. Being able to voice our deepest personal needs and desires is not always an easy thing to do—especially when it comes to sex. Most will agree though, that identifying and expressing exactly what we want (and don’t want) in a sexual relationship with an intimate partner is crucial in establishing a healthy and fulfilling sex life—namely one characterized by consent and equal pleasure.

In the language of human relationships, "setting limits" means letting people know what is acceptable to you and what is not. This doesn’t just apply to serious matters, like domestic violence or breaking one’s vows—limits for small things are important as well.

Setting limits is an expression of your human value, of your self worth, in matters small and large. By setting limits you say: "I am a worthy person. I deserve to be treated in a way that feels good to me."

Just when I'm feeling Zen—confident I'm manifesting a beautiful life à la Law of Attraction—someone in a bad mood or who is clearly not concerned about me enters my personal space and gets me completely off-kilter. You know who I'm talking about—those who don't listen to you, push their way on you. They are so skilled that they make you question your desires, values, or goals as they charmingly persuade you to do their will.