Tag: obligations

Fall is in the air, and with the change of seasons, comes the realization that the holidays are fast approaching. So it’s really tempting this time of the year to say "yes" to every invitation and holiday project. But saying "yes" to 50 more things when you’re already overloaded with work, family, and friendships, can test even the healthiest of marriages. Why? We tend to put our husband or wife as the last priority on our long to-do list, which can cause hurt feelings, fights, and resentment.

For those of us with a highly sensitive nervous system—15-20% of the population processes nuances and stimulation at a greater level of intensity—the holiday season can bring extra trepidation. We feel the pressure to put ourselves out in the midst of the holiday hustle and bustle and we feel the need to protect ourselves from overstimulation.

This time of year puts many of us face to face with forced socializing, hosting, family drama and paradoxically, feelings of loneliness. Dr. Elaine Aron, author of "The Highly Sensitive Person," says we often feel we are "too out" or "too in."

Here we go… into the crazy holiday season again. Ready or not, it’s here. Love it, hate it, or couldn’t care less—this is a time of year when… how do I put this? People get crazy busy and energy is frantic many places you go.

Let’s be honest, it can be exhausting.

Especially if you’re the person who makes it all happen. Being sure all the gifts are perfect. Decorating all the things that need decorating. Cooking all the meals and baking all the treats. Hosting the parties. Going to the parties. Festivities GALORE!

Life is built on routines. It’s easy to go years—or even decades—without consciously assessing what’s working and what’s not. As a result, many of us are surrounded by people, obligations, objects, and habits that aren’t exactly making our lives better (far from it!).

Well, no more. With a new year upon us, it’s the perfect time to take a fresh look at your daily existence—and drop all the dead weight that’s holding you back.

Are you following your mission in life or do you feel disconnected from what you want to do, believe in and value? Are other people defining who you are? The more your time is organized around your values the more energy you gain from your activities. Here are a few ideas that can help you stay "on flow."

1. Figure out who you want to be and what you want to do. Many of us ignore our dreams in the interest of providing for our families, or because we think we don't deserve them—but all that does is leave us unhappy and listless. If this describes you, spend some time deciding what you want to do and be.