Tag: scent

Sex and relationship expert, Dr. Trina Read, is ready to answer your questions.

My sex life has definitely hit a rut. What can I do to make it fun?

You have so many options the hard part will be choosing. The trick is you have to: (1) figure out new ideas; (2) be willing to break your sex routine and; (3) not take your sex so seriously.

Let’s look at the average couple’s bedroom sex scene. They have: very little to no talking, no changing up of the old and tired sex routine, certainly no laughing, no toys, no games, no nothing.

The arousal response is your body’s natural mechanism for accessing pleasure. Although often confused with the genital swelling that accompanies our arousal response, the ignition for our arousal lives in the sexiest organ of our body: Our Brain.

Specifically, in the limbic area of the brain, which also processes memory and emotion and is conveniently co-located with our olfactory bulb, which explains why our sense of smell invigorates our emotional process, our access to memories, as well as our feeling of being turned on. Truly, your orgasmic potential begins with your ability to cultivate your arousal mechanism. Interesting studies have demonstrated that working with your physical arousal response can actually instigate sexual desire, rather than the reverse of waiting for desire to jumpstart arousal. This is heartening news because tapping into and enlarging our capacity for arousal is no different than developing any other physical response. Here are four helpful tips to get acquainted with and befriend your arousal mechanism.

"The trick is in what one emphasizes. We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same." ~ Carlos Castenada

Really great sex happens outside of ordinary reality. It creates a non-ordinary reality beyond the language of everyday life and outside of the conceptual framework in which we order those days. Fitting our sexuality into our ordinary reality flattens its potential, relying on repetitive actions and a kind of cognitive dissonance that separates us from the moment we are in. I have been thinking about this for a long time, but it was just in these last couple of weeks since I began practicing Shamanic journeys that I recognized the language I have been missing.