Tag: space

I never felt like a normal "Mom." As soon as my first daughter was born, I knew in an instant that she was her own person, an infinite soul that I got to guide in this life. Parenting became a journey of joint self-discovery.

I didn’t feel like I was here to shape, mold or control her. I felt like a guide who was blessed with this wise soul who chose me as her Mom. The word "Mom" didn’t ever really resonate. Instead, I felt like I was learning along with them and they were and are as much my teacher as I am theirs.

Parent: "How was your day?"
Teen: "Good."

"What did you do today?"
"Nothing."

Does that sound like a recent conversation you had with your teen? Parents desperately want to communicate with their kids, but few know how to get a tight-lipped teen to open up. The result is a dead-end "chat" that leaves both parent and child feeling disconnected.

Adjusting to a married lifestyle can be a challenge. If your spouse has moved into your one-bedroom apartment, you now have double the stuff with half the space. Cramped quarters are uncomfortable and can put strain on any relationship. Without some distance people become irritable, and what starts off as "to have and to hold" quickly spirals into a fight about invading personal space. With these four steps, you can learn to open up your home so you can breathe and live better.

Step 1: Contain the clutter.
To start, cut down on the used coffee cups, unopened mail and messy magazines strewn all over the house. Clutter creates a psychological effect of feeling stuffy and closed in. If you’re drowning in clutter, try this technique:

My husband smothers me and I've tried telling him, and well, it doesn't work. I mean, he walks to the bathroom with me. If I get up off the couch he wants to know where I am going. If he takes the trash to the dump he won't go unless I ride with him. Even if I am cooking, cleaning or whatever, he insists I ride with him. I am feeling choked. Any advice?

Any healthy relationship needs to strike a comfortable balance between autonomy and connection for both partners, and it sounds like your husband isn’t giving you the space you need to achieve this.