Tag: arguing

As we think about life skills that we want to teach our kids, a few things that may come to mind are: washing dishes, balancing a bank account, and keeping a clean home. However, how to have a respectful disagreement should be high on that list.

There are two schools of thought on the topic of arguing in front of children. One group: don’t do it. The other: how do you not? There are a few things to consider as we open this Pandora’s Box.

How often do you see people in your extended family or community who believe their family gets along just fine and doesn't have any problems? However, upon further inspection, you find that screaming, yelling, name-calling and physical aggressiveness is almost the norm. There almost seems to be a denial that there is a deeper issue, and because of this, the conflict continues and people believe that destructive behaviors are acceptable. Whether it is sibling rivalries, parents behaving badly, physically or verbally abusive behaviors and/or conflicts between extended family members, these patterns of conflicts often endure from generation to generation. What are the factors that start these conflicts and continue them across time?

True love isn’t about running in slow motion across a field of wildflowers into each other’s arms and murmuring sweet nothings into each other’s ears. Nor is it about being on a never-ending honeymoon and existing in a perpetual state of ecstatic union where every day is sunny and we engage in perfectly synchronized, effortless, multiple-orgasmic, no-sweat, no-fart sex.

Chances are, you and your spouse talked before you were married about having children. You probably discussed parenting in general and even watched each other interacting with children. Now that you are parents and the realities of daily life with a young child are sinking in, you might be seeing differences you don’t like. When you try to discuss it, you might not agree on the best way to handle a situation. The stress is not only affecting you and your marriage, but your young child is picking up on it, too.

In these tough times of economic and political turmoil, with a critical presidential election right around the corner, everyone is talking politics—around the dinner table, over coffee, over drinks and at parties. The upcoming election is in the air!

But what about couples who are in different political parties with opposing points of view? Can they live happily ever after?

It depends on several issues:

1. Maturity. The more mature a person is, the more able they are to "get out of themselves" and

More often than not, flash-fire arguments are a result of long-standing conflicts that are not being addressed and are excuses to dance around deep, core issues. Assigning blame for starting these arguments misses the issue. A couple must learn how to see through arguments to the person behind them.

For instance, let’s say that one person in a relationship is mad that the other is doing something that reflects a deep and entrenched part of their personality. Let’s say that this person is worried and concerned that a partner never opens up about personal feelings