Tag: fear

John was a successful dentist who managed his own money his entire life and prided himself on his financial acumen. When he retired, he saw no reason to change. Instead of kicking back and enjoying a well-earned life of leisure, John became not only financially invested in the markets, but emotionally invested as well; much to the detriment of his personal life—and his money.

John would wake up early and seclude himself downstairs with three screens. He would look at research before the market opened. He would be grouchy when the market closed if he hadn’t done well that day. Even if he went on vacation, he was tethered to Wall Street.

It's normal to resist change, whether it comes knocking unannounced or when it rests as a looming feeling deep within us, nudging us towards growth. Most people don’t accept change easily, ironically, even when we have been begging the cosmos for change for years. The idea of "better" can be far more appealing than the reality of shifting your life and leaving things behind to actualize this "better" life you dream of.

Understandably, we get very comfortable with what we know. It could be a relationship, a job, a move, our weight, hair style, etc.

When Lady Gaga recently told her fans that kindness—not wealth and fame—is what creates harmony in the world she may have been on to something. Research has shown that being kind makes us happier and also is contagious, inspiring others to be kind as well. For example, one such study published in the Journal of Social Psychology linked performing acts of kindness to an increase in life satisfaction.

That’s why as people make their resolutions for the coming New Year, they should make up their minds to commit purposeful acts of kindness every day.

In your daily life, are you guided by fear or by love? Connecting on the deepest levels require that we open up and let others see the whole of us. Our truth includes flaws, but those imperfections don't diminish our ability to love or be loved—in fact, they make us unique and can concentrate what makes us special. What are the fears that block being loving to yourself and others?

How often is the question, “What is loving to myself and others—what is in my highest good and the highest good of another?” the question that guides your actions? Is there something in the way of you asking this question? What is the fear that gets in the way of loving yourself? Here are two quick example.

Unless you are living in an isolated cave, social conflict is inevitable. Our needs, interests, and desires collide with each other, getting in the way of our happiness.

Conflict is not inherently bad, however. We need conflict to teach us, entertain us, and help us grow. We can probably do without Jerry Springer’s craziness, but a certain amount of conflict is healthy. On the other hand, we also experience unhealthy conflict; when the conflict becomes chronic and repetitive, it is toxic.

This piece started as a letter to my teenage daughter. Much to my dismay she got herself a boyfriend.

Although I would have preferred she wait until she was a bit older, love had something else in mind. So my husband and I decided to embrace it as an opportunity to teach her some things about life and relationships. Six months later we are still in it knee deep.

Never let your mind underestimate just how far your feet are willing to take you. This article about goals was inspired by a memorable client named Andra. She hired me as her coach to help her mentally prepare for a two-day, 39-mile walk event to end breast cancer.

There were other criteria we were coaching to as well, but this was one of those big, audacious goals where she was starting off with a flutter of possibility in her heart and a big gulp in her throat.