Tag: intimacy

It is so important to meet like-minded couples who you can connect with and learn from. No relationship is perfect and getting inspired by other couples can be the best way to expand your horizons and discover new and amazing things together.

I am the kind of person who enjoys traveling alone, but having a husband along for the ride has been rewarding. We got to enjoy Valentine’s Day in India, and I thought I would make a tribute to why traveling with your long-term partner is especially awesome.

"The real vulnerability is not from taking off our clothes together, but in baring our hearts to one another…" ~ Wendy Strgar, "Sex that Works"?

This week marks the official launch of my new book, "Sex that Works-An Intimate Guide to Awakening Your Erotic Life." I have often said that if we could only fix one problem in our life and it was sex—we would by default, fix all of the others.  What most people don’t realize is that the shame and pain that inhibit their sexual freedom and capacity for intimate pleasure also blocks their ability to feel a wide range of other emotions.  The closer we come to living in our own erotic truth, the more our relationship to the rest of our life opens up as well.

High levels of intimacy are the most fulfilling aspects of any marriage. Unfortunately, intimacy is also one of the first things that fades away for many couples. What replaces intimacy are feelings of sadness, resentment and loneliness.

Intimacy is the actualized aliveness of love in the relationship. It demonstrates deep caring. Without it partners will feel empty and neglected.

You’re not alone if you’ve exclaimed, "Hey! That’s not funny!" after bearing the brunt of a "joke" that doesn’t feel at all humorous to you. Words can injure relationships more than you might imagine. Many relationships are harmed by the long-lasting scars of verbal sparring. Often disguised as joking or bantering, derisive commentary poisons intimacy and connection. Although sarcasm and other caustic forms of communication have become acceptable in many social settings, toxic expressions are inherently disrespectful and harmful.

"Masturbation: the primary sexual activity of mankind. In the nineteenth century it was a disease; in the twentieth, it’s a cure." ~ Thomas Szasz

Of all the sexual acts on the planet, masturbation leads the way as not only the most commonly practiced and safest ways to have sex, but also as the one that most frequently and reliably ends in orgasm. Not terribly surprising when you consider who would know better than you, the mysterious pathway to climax.

When a couple has been married for a long time, romance somehow takes a back seat to the many tasks and responsibilities each one has to take care of every day. Before you were married, your sweet date nights that used to be candle lit romantic dinners become sleepless nights caring for the baby. Your fun movie dates turn into watching TV at home and then falling fast asleep because you are both too tired to watch. Even sex, if you still do it,  becomes rote and obligatory. Does this all sound familiar to you?

Intimacy develops in all of our relationships when we are able to be honest with ourselves, honest with others, and express our vulnerability. Intimacy is often considered as a sentiment shared only by couples or in romantic relationships, but all of our relationships have varying levels of intimacy associated with them dependent on the level of honesty and vulnerability we are willing to exchange. Intimacy is the fiber that connects us to people. When we feel disconnected from ourselves and from others, it is usually intimacy and our intimate connections that need our attention and focus to bring us back into the very desirable state of intimate connection with others.