Tag: worth

There were millions upon millions of glittering lights shattering the night, tall neon-lit buildings reaching up to the sky, black limousines, bright red Ferraris and silver Porsches gliding slowly and elegantly down the main strip.

As my buddy and I walked down the Las Vegas Strip late one summer night, I asked, "What would it be like to own all of this—to own all the money, land, buildings, and cars in the world?" "I can’t even imagine," my friend replied.

In the language of human relationships, "setting limits" means letting people know what is acceptable to you and what is not. This doesn’t just apply to serious matters, like domestic violence or breaking one’s vows—limits for small things are important as well.

Setting limits is an expression of your human value, of your self worth, in matters small and large. By setting limits you say: "I am a worthy person. I deserve to be treated in a way that feels good to me."

After my marriage ended, I swore I would never stuff down my emotions and act like everything was OK or remain silent about what I needed from a partner. I was going to be open and communicate effectively. I had no idea how hard it is to know what you want and articulate it. I had no idea how hard it is to express your feelings without hurting the other person. No wonder I just let things pile up internally in my marriage. I kept quiet and felt alone. No wonder when I finally couldn't take it anymore I recklessly and ineffectively exploded verbally.