Tag: negative

Miracles start to happen when you give as much energy to your dreams as you do to your fears." ~ Richard Wilkins

A dear friend was lamenting the state of the world these days, and indeed, the wars, shootings, political and legal wrangles are disturbing to those who want peace and prosperity for all. In addition to the natural disasters, which seem constant: fires, floods, hurricanes and tornadoes.

What impact has COVID and quarantine had on our self-confidence?

I recently read a research article stating there was an increased use of social media platforms during lockdown and an increase in the number of people reporting low self-esteem.

Why do we compare ourselves to others to determine our self-esteem or self-confidence? Do you believe that your self-confidence is in your control? It is.

Ever noticed how you talk to yourself when you've made a mistake or failed to do something the way you wanted to? The inner conversation often runs something like this:

"I can't believe I said that to my husband/wife. I am a complete moron. My spouse is going to be upset with me for days;"

or

"Fifteen pounds! I can't believe I gained 15 pounds! I promised my spouse I’d pay more attention to my health. I have no self-control, I'm a mess;"

Peace, joy, and gratitude—feelings we all wish for, but ones that can be hard to come by in our stressful world. When we're bombarded with our own negative thoughts, it can make us feel as though we’re in a self-made prison of blame and judgments, making it feel impossible to relish the good in our lives. Happiness has a biological basis, and research shows that we can take steps toward creating a positive and healthy mental space, despite the stresses of living in a demanding, technology-driven existence.

Identify theft is real, and it is awful. But there is a worse thief that lurks in the secret recesses of our private thoughts. And that person is called, the "Joy Thief."

Negativity is the name of the "Joy Thief’s" game, and it is a deadly one.

The Joy Thief, when allowed into our hearts, can ruin the best of marriages—the joy that is our natural birthright, whether it come from the beauty of a sunset, the glow of pride from a job well done or the warmth of a smile. All these pale and turn cold when negativity overwhelms our lives.

Water which is too pure has no fish. ~Zen proverb

Reciting affirmations, listening to motivational coaches—who needs the stress of being happy all the time, blissfully in love, or overly optimistic in precarious situations? Apparently, many people believed in Tony Robbins’ "Unleash the Power Within" event and about two-dozen were severely burned when they walked on hot coals. For example, if you found and brought home an injured snake, nursed and fed it and then one day the snake bit you, would you feel betrayed or should you have realized that the snake was just being a snake and taken precautions?

It's time to rethink our perception of ourselves. Many of us have trouble listing our signature strengths, but can easily itemize the flaws. Along the way we force ourselves to fit the mold and become an artificial version of ourselves. Even worse, the self-criticism accompanying these imperfections causes an uneasiness leading to irritability or self-suppression. Consequently, we overdo and deplete ourselves with busyness to atone or even take medication.